Initiating Probal Defence Measures: The Destroy All Humans! Invasion Date Is Set For July 28th, 2020

What follows is an incoming transmission originating from somewhere between Earth and Mars:

“Greetings, fleshy Earthbeings.

Cryptosporidium here, though you skin-wrapped water wads can call me Crypto-137.
I wanted to let you know that my Abducto Beam is finally ready and I’m journeying Earthwards right now. If my calculations are correct then P-Day – that’s Probe-Day to you mortal meat morsels – is set for July 28th, 2020. On that day I will officially Destroy All Humans!

I’ll see you future-victims soon on PC, PlayStation®4, and Xbox One™!”

Destroy All Humans! has already been available for pre-order on PC, PlayStation®4, and Xbox One™ from your preferred retailer, and is now also available for pre-order digitally on PC and Xbox One™. The SRP of the PC version is €29.99 / $29.99 / £24.99 / ₽1,529, and the SRP for consoles is €39.99 / $39.99 / £34.99 / ₽2,799 (PlayStation®4 and Xbox One™). Pre-order Skins available via selected channels only!

The Crypto-137 Edition, featuring a Crypto-137 figurine, a Crypto backpack, keychain, six lithographs, anti-stress toy and all in-game Crypto skins, all contained within a premium box, is available for pre-order now and has an SRP of €399.99 | $399.99 | £349.99 | seven tons of mutilated cow corpse juice’s worth of Crypto currency.

The DNA Collector’s Edition, featuring a Crypto’N’Cow figurine, keychain, six lithographs, anti-stress toy, and all in-game Crypto skins, all contained within a premium box, is available for pre-order now and has an SRP of €149.99 | $149.99 | £139.99 | twelve charred human femurs’ worth of Crypto currency.

Features

Use your Abducto Beam to throw tanks around!
Use your psychokinesis powers to crush a farmer under his own cow!
Discover which seemingly prude ’50s housewife secretly has the hots for her hairdresser!
Slowly batter a human to death with his own hat!
Light up the night by zapping your enemies with Teslatastic electricity!
Take. One. Giant. Step. On. Mankind!

Visit the website for more information: Official Destroy All Humans! Website