Written and directed by Guy Maddin, Evan Johnson, and Galen Johnson, Rumours is a black comedy horror satire film starring Cate Blanchett, Charles Dance, Roy Dupuis, Alicia Vikander, and more international stars.

World leaders meet at the G7 held in Germany and while having lunch together at a newly built gazebo out in the woods, they soon find themselves all alone with no wait staff or anyone else around. They try to find help but get lost in the woods whilst trying to compose a joint statement on an unspecified global crisis. Beset by thick fog and menaced by undead bog bodies and a giant brain, they navigate the tortured passions between them.

The simplest way to describe this movie is bizarre. It has an interesting premise of world leaders finding themselves in a mysterious and scary situation, but the execution is just strange and difficult to make any sense of. Having Presidents and Prime Ministers as the main characters makes it difficult to relate to and feel much sympathy for them.

Even after encountering supernatural-like beings, they still talk about politically related topics. Sometimes the topics are relative to their recent experiences. Other times they are more worried about the public perception of themselves, which ironically is how world leaders are in the real world.

Most of the cast consists of actors who come from the countries their characters represent. Roy Dupuis plays Maxime Laplace, the Prime Minister of Canada, Denis Ménochet is Sylvain Broulez, the President of France, Nikki Amuka-Bird is Cardosa Dewindt, the Prime Minister of the UK, Rolando Ravello is Antonio Lamorte, the Prime Minister of Italy, Takehiro Hira is Tatsuro Iwasaki, the Prime Minister of Japan, Zlatko Burić as Jonas Glob, the President of the European Union, and Alicia Vikander as Celestine Sproul, the Secretary-General of the European Commission.

They all give authenticity to representing their nations with their accents and mannerisms. The country flag pins on their suits also helps signify which countries they lead.

Only two of the cast aren’t from the countries they portray the leaders of. Australian star, Cate Blanchett plays Hilda Ortmann, the Chancellor of Germany and does an excellent job of doing a German accent and carries herself as an important figure. English star, Charles Dance portrays Edison Wolcott, the President of the United States.

Although he is one of the finest actors in the industry, he doesn’t seem to make any effort to put on an American accent and seems out of place with his English accent and the American flag pin on his suit. If Cate Blanchett can make a convincing German politician, why couldn’t Charles at least try?

Charles Dance is still entertaining to watch, as is the rest of the cast, and the chemistry between them all feels natural, but none of that was enough to make the movie watchable. When major plot points, plot twists, and big reveals happen, it’s hard to care about any of it as they all end up being lacklustre and underwhelming.

The set pieces have some nice scenery and give those dark, creepy feelings and not knowing what may be lurking around the corner but is overall generic and nothing we haven’t seen before. One location had the nicest looking flowers and other plants which was only used for a pointless love scene that had no buildup and made absolutely no sense at all with the crisis they were currently in.

They all must avoid the undead bog bodies, which was explained early in the film. They are something the government is trying to hide from the public and not spark any conspiracy theories. They certainly aren’t something you’d want to encounter in real life, but how they behave makes you feel more uncomfortable than scared.

They rapidly gyrate their boneless bodies, almost like they’re pleasuring themselves, which maybe they were. It just comes across as awkward and keeps you asking, “Why?”. There’s also an oversized brain that has some importance to the plot if you haven’t already given up on the film by then and the way one of the characters interacts with it also makes no sense.

The overall style and presentation are done as if the film was made in the 80s or earlier but like a bad episode of The Twilight Zone. The soundtrack adds to the creepy atmosphere and has a retro feel, but nothing makes the film more enjoyable.

There may be a particular audience for this black comedy horror satire, but it would still be hard to understand how anyone would enjoy it. The idea of the story feels like something that would be better suited as a written novel without the visuals, or a different directing style might’ve done a better job. It barely has any redeeming factors worth mentioning and feels like something made up in someone’s twisted mind that should’ve stayed there, rather than bring it to life on film. Rumours is a bizarre and uninteresting film full of underwhelming plot twists and characters you could barely care for.

Written by: Sammy Hanson